The Gold Kit Surprise - Recycling Gold Trash

[NewWorldSlacker]

This had me on the floor. Silly Corporation..... no soup for you.

http://www.cockeyed.com/citizen/goldkit/gold_kit.shtml

The Gold Kit Surprise - Recycling Gold Trash

http://www.cockeyed.com/citizen/goldkit/goldkit01.jpg











After enduring dozens of their "scrap gold" television commercials, I decided to try out the Lippencott "Gold Kit".
If you haven't seen these, they advise you to turn your crappy old "scrap gold" into cash.







http://www.cockeyed.com/citizen/goldkit/goldkit02.jpg











I called the 800 number and was connected to a very nice gal. She was very polite and asked for my name, address and phone number. She promised to send a "Gold Kit".
A few days later, their package arrived. It was a business reply envelope, a thick plastic bag, and a brochure about the gold recycling. I was ready to go!
Actually, I was a little disappointed, because I wanted to write an article about how incredibly terrible their offering price is. Unfortunately, they don't actually tell you how much they pay for used gold.






http://www.cockeyed.com/citizen/goldkit/goldkit03.jpg







The look and frequency of their television commercials did nothing to establish them as a legitimate market-rate merchant of precious metals, so I was not at all surprised that they didn't name their price.
Lippencott employs the following system:



You send in your gold items.
Lippencott decides what they will pay for the items.
Lippencott sends you a check in the mail.
If the check is acceptable, you cash it. If not, send the check back and they will return your gold.

To test their system and discover their exchange price, I should have sent in a known quantity of pure gold.








http://www.cockeyed.com/citizen/goldkit/goldkit04.jpg







Unfortunately, real gold is very rare, and hella expensive. Even after checking the whole recycling bin and both garbage cans, I found that I had absolutely no gold scraps in the house.
I grabbed some doo-dads out of the junk drawer and some gold spray-paint out of the garage.
Soon I had a gold bottle cap, a gold stem from a bunch of grapes, a gold pop-top, a gold zip-tie, a gold 'S' hook, a gold nut and the elusive gold nickel.
In all, a nice sack of treasure!








http://www.cockeyed.com/citizen/goldkit/goldkit06.jpg





I followed the Gold Kit directions and stapled the bag shut. This would thwart thieves.
This seemed a little cheesy. Isn't there a high-security version of the ziplock seal?
No? Well, there should be.






http://www.cockeyed.com/citizen/goldkit/goldkit08.jpg





I made a note of my unique Gold Kit tracking number, packed everything back into the business reply envelope and sealed it.






http://www.cockeyed.com/citizen/goldkit/goldkit10.jpg









I hung the envelope on our mailbox.... and waited!


......................
















Nine days later, my wife called me at work.
A letter had arrived with the words "Payment Enclosed/Incluye Pago" on the front.
Wha? Payment?










http://www.cockeyed.com/citizen/goldkit/goldkit12.jpg











































Inside was a short explanation of the payment schedule, detailing how every single thing that is precious or valuable is actually worthless.
It was a laundry list of reasons that they couldn't give you any money for your stuff:


Many items appear to be gold, but they are not.
Fashion watches have no value and are reimbursed accordingly as a disposable item
Small colored stones (also known as gems) have no technical market value.
Small diamonds (contrary to everything you've every learned in your whole life) have very little value.



http://www.cockeyed.com/citizen/goldkit/goldkit13.jpg



































But there, after all that buildup, at the bottom of the letter, was my payment!
A real check for $1.01!
Incredible! They really do pay cash for gold, and not just real gold... any gold at all!
Next time you see the ad, give them a call and get the gold kit. Isn't there something gold you can send them?

[NewWorldSlacker]

Yeah... he had NO GOLD to send in..... Draw your own conclusions on the percent of tech savvy blogger sheeple who actually own an article made of real gold. Heck for most of em their most valuable items are made of the same 'valuable material' that their keyboards are made of...... Polyvinyl Chloride (PVC)

Yeah, Plastic.... CH2=CHCl

Q:

What is plastic made out of?


Answer

The majority of what we know as plastics used today are mainly made from one major ingredient: oil. The same kind of oil that runs our automobiles and the economy. :banghead:

[AuNuggets]

You can just about imagine the bags and bags of absolutely worthless shit that these people get. The real problem is that MOST OF THEM think they are sending real gold. How about all of those "Golden Dollar" coins the U.S. Mint is always advertising ? "Whatta ya mean it's NOT GOLD ? The MINT says it is !!!!!!" Gold plated, gold layered, gold filled, gold wash, gold colored......... yap, yap, yap. :banghead:

[ME CO]

My friend sent them 1/2 oz of gold alloy he had been recovering from black sands and was playing with refining. His check came to a whopping $40 with an attached assay stating it was 18 k- since when do assays read karrot and not percent. BTW he sent his check back LOL. HH Mark

[TheGrayGhost]

HaHa, hilarious.:D
Hell, I'm surprised he got a $1.01 check for that junk worth $0.05

I think I have some gold paint in the garage...

[Twisted Avatar]

Wow........


Great share........let there be no question in anyones mind ANYTHING AND I MEAN ANYTHING THAT IS ADVERTISED ON TV IS A FRICKEN RIPOFF!!.


Save this thread....... it will be good a practical for future new jacks.



T

[squexx]

This is just too hilarious! This guy has a hell of a sense of humor, and he cuts the knees out from under these a##holes in a very funny way! Very well done article!

[beefsteak]

This had me on the floor. Silly Corporation..... no soup for you.

http://www.cockeyed.com/citizen/goldkit/gold_kit.shtml

**********************
But there, after all that buildup, at the bottom of the letter, was my payment!
A real check for $1.01!
Incredible! They really do pay cash for gold, and not just real gold... any gold at all!
Next time you see the ad, give them a call and get the gold kit. Isn't there something gold you can send them?

Most excellent story teller there, GIM'er.

Here are my 2 thoughts...
you received a $1.01 check from them, plus a postage paid envelope return service (approx $3.50 expense to them) plus the toll free number and cutsie free mailer with insert initial pkg...total perhaps $5.00?

The industry standard for digging up a "hot" call customer via any lead generator medium is now in excess of $32 per each last study I read.

The stats are:
10 out of any interested pool of 100;
3 leads
1 actual active participant.

The pool of potential US Households = 90,000,000 economic units give or take a few.

1/10 of those economic units max who have or might view the TV blitz.

All in all, your courtesy check of $1.01 is a very cheap price cost and part of the <$5 out of pocket lead generator cost equation to "find you."

What I'd be truly interested in is if you would repeat your gold paint experiment, including some gold plated costume jewelery in with your gold paint, and see if you could get them to courtesy pay you 2x in a row.:clap2::clap2:

Good work! Great Photos. Excellent presentation!
:bull-buddy-icon:

[squexx]

I lived in Vegas once a upon a time. The first job I had there (and a very short lived one) was as a cold caller for time share crap. They get your information from those cards you fill out at the mall to win stuff. You'd be surprised what a big racket getting consumer info all is!

[Worldmariner]

This had me on the floor. Silly Corporation..... no soup for you.
But there, after all that buildup, at the bottom of the letter, was my payment!
A real check for $1.01!
Incredible! They really do pay cash for gold, and not just real gold... any gold at all!
Next time you see the ad, give them a call and get the gold kit. Isn't there something gold you can send them?

DUDE! I have heard that diamonds are not really worth much also. I just toss them in the garbage when I find one! I see you had a SUPER RARE solid gold bottlecap. I am surprised they did not pay you full market value for it! *laugh*

Just think of the people that send in 4 ounces of 18k *junk* and get a check back for $800... And they think they are getting a great score!

[jedemdasseine]

I tried this scheme a while back and sure enough, I got a check for $1.01. All I sent them was some gold-colored costume jewelry and paperclips. Free money.